On the Difficulties of Preventing Butt Growth While Writing a Dissertation

I have been exactly the same size and weight since I was 17. I know this for two reasons:
1) Most of my clothing is that old
2) I pole vaulted that year and was monitoring my weight the whole season, hoping I could go back to vaulting on the 120 pole. 
When I was 17, I danced at least 20 hours a week.  If you don't believe me, you can either watch surveillance videos from Olympia grocery stores from the year 2000, or talk to anyone who knew me. I stopped dancing when I was 20, due to a spinal injury. One would think that I would have gained weight after that, but I've been a student living on rice and beans for most of my adult life.

In the years that I wasn't a student, I taught German and history and was on my feet all day. During that time, I played a lot of music in my classroom and bounced around the classroom while my students conjugated, declined or took notes from my entertaining power point presentations. I thought that my active lifestyle stopped when I moved to the Midwest, but according to my students' evals of me, it didn't. One evaluation had the comment "she jumps" on it. I asked a former student about this, wondering if I jumped between topics. My student replied, "No, Kelsie, you literally jump up and down when you teach."

Now I teach online classes. It's great for giving me time to work on Geraldine, but my dress pants aren't fitting as well as they used to. This shouldn't be too big of a surprise. After all, I spend a minimum of 4 hours with Geraldine Monday through Friday, mostly sitting, and during the semester, I spend a lot of time responding to student e-mails (most of which could be avoided if my students actually read the course syllabus). I also haven't had a lot of time to ride horses this academic year because my schedule and lack of funds have overlapped with my trainer's. Yes, riding horses also usually involves sitting, but dressage and hunt seat are killer leg work-outs too.

So how to remedy this situation? I think I need to bring my saddle home with me and place it on top of my saddle stand. If I sit on my saddle while spending time with Geraldine, I can:
1) Kick when a task isn't going fast enough
2) Squeeze when it's going in the wrong direction
3) Post when the pace is good
4) Two point whenever there's a hurdle
5) Do around the worlds whenever I'm waiting for a page to load

Good thing I have a lesson tonight!

In the meantime, I'll keep watching zumba and Tahitian cardio clips on YouTube whenever I get too cold to type...